Patience can be hard in a world where most of our needs are met in an instance, or the next day.
If we want to know something, it’s just on the other end of a Google search.
With all the various forms of communication, WhatsApp, texting, social media we expect instant answers. If we do not get one, we are surprised, even feeling let down if it does not happen.
I believe we have lost touch with and forgotten that it’s fine to wait. We’ve even forgotten the positives: the wonder of anticipation, the reward of patience.
All this leads me into thinking about rehab with patients. How we have to manage their expectations, their commitment and their understanding that the process takes time and repetition to create change.
Often when people attend the clinic for treatment, they will ask would exercises help? I will more often than not say “Yes, they will help, they will support the work we are doing here together and they will support your recovery towards wellness.”
But then the next thing I say is “do you think you will do them? I will not give you them until I know you are all in committed to the time each day. There is no point if not. I’d love to discuss what might stop you making that commitment to yourself.”
At times they look a little shocked and surprised at our directness.
What might they answer when we ask what stops you from taking 1 5 mins to yourself?
- I can’t find space when time with family is already limited
- I feel guilty
- I’m too tired to stake my claim
- I come last
We then explore the words they need to say “this is my time to value my health and wellbeing”.
We will often rehearse finding time, starting with addressing their needs to their loved ones. Nothing will change until they find their reasons why.
We go on to discuss how this is going to take practice, practice, practice. Often quoting the Norman Doidge’s book, The Brain That Changes Itself, where he shows evidence through collective research that change can take place through a mixture of positive thinking, determination, and physical movement, be it Pilates, yoga, prescribed movements. The forgotten aspect of this is that the brain needs it on repeat before hearing the message that change can take place.
Practice is something I have done since meeting Pilates and Claire Sparrow my Pilates mentor. I have never felt as connected to my body and as stable as I feel at this moment in time.
I’ve recently discovered I have a hypermobility syndrome, and always have apparently. I am by nature a resilient old soul, with an enquiring mind, that asks how I can support myself to do the work that feels like my life purpose. This means I practice my Pilates, that gives me my stability and moments of mindfulness. That’s the time I make for myself so I can help others – but I had to practice to get there.
So can you give practice ago this 2022?